books and marriage…

(this is sketchy. very. but, that’s what i do best sometimes. =))

i’ve been thinking about marriage and books.
books and marriage.
i love, LOVE to read.
but, in this season of packing and getting ready to move 1,200 miles, i have not had time for much more than (on good days) my morning devotionals and Bible readings.
i love a good book with intricate plots and details.
i love a book that keeps me guessing and that i cannot put down.
i love the likes of John Grisham, and Kelly Corrigan, and Ann Voskamp, and Jodi Piccoult, and Kathryn Stockett, and Nicolas Sparks, and John Piper to name a few.
they are all really good authors who can tell a tale that reels me in and brings me back for more.
and, when i think of marriage, it’s like a book that is being written day by day.
and, sometimes, i think that in this book called marriage, we are not on the same page.
and, other times we are.
there’s times when he’s two pages or two chapters ahead of me and it’s okay.
there’s times when i feel like our being on different chapters or pages is not good for us, but when i really stop and look at the actual book and not just the page we’re on, i realize that as long as we’re still in the same book, we are going to be okay.
when i go back and look at the first few chapters of our book, i see how much fun we had in those early days.
i see how young we were and how naive we were.
i see how while in some ways as the story is being written we have more of a clue about things, in other ways, we know less than we did when we started this book.
i see how the more times goes on and the more people that come into our lives, the longer and more detailed the story gets.
i see how as we have spent almost 13 years in this one place, this section of the book is almost a book in itself and it’s as though we are about to start writing a new book together.
but, it’s not a new book.
we will take what we have written together here and go into a new place with new people and new opportunities and new challenges and new joys and new circumstances and watch as God helps us write the next section of this book.
as we close chapters here and anticipate opening new chapters in this next section of our book, i feel so excited and sad and exhilerated all at once.
i feel hopeful.
i feel so excited to see what God brings to us as we open this new section and continue writing this book together.
no doubt there will be portions of the book where we will still be at different pages and chapters.
but, we’re still in the same book with the same Author writing the script.
yesterday i read Ann Voskamp’s blog and this one phrase in particular stuck out to me: ‘Love without Truth isn’t reality-it’s sentimentality. And Truth without Love isn’t sustainable–it’s terminal.’
and, i’ve thought so much about those words of simplistic truth.
what if the story line of our marriage was all Love without Truth?
or vice versa?
as she said, it would not survive.
so, amidst the ugly truth, the simple love, the extravagant love, the painful truth and sometimes misunderstandings, we love and hope and aim forward together in this story of our marriage.
along the way, we’ll stop and reread chapters together and sometimes separately and that too is okay for us.
and, while this very page we are on is actually quite stress-filled as we move around our house amidst boxes and stacks of rubbermaid totes, i am so thankful that our Valentine’s Day was what it was yesterday.
far, far from any kind of fairy-tale story.
it was a paragraph of both mess and frustration amidst simple joy and love.
but, it was us.
it was our story of imperfect love and hope and we like it that way.
where truth and love collide we embrace reality for what it really is: God’s work in our hearts.
God’s writing our story.
and, that is the best part.
He is an Author who keeps us coming back for more, longing for more clarity and understanding.
and, we can trust His pen that makes no mistakes.

with love,


4 thoughts on “books and marriage…

  1. Beautiful words, Rachel. Marriage really does have so many seasons and chapters and growing pains among all the celebrations and moving to a community can rock your boat like none other. I love the way you talked about how other people bring dynamics into your marriage. I think this is true more than we realize sometimes because we tend to think of marriage as a relationship between the two of us. But really, all of life is so intertwined and enmeshed it all affects the other. Thinking of you lots as you keep getting ready to move and hoping….oh so hoping that the adjustments go smoothly for all of you.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I totally ‘get’ this part about marriage being like a book….about how we are not always on the same page, but at least we are in the same book. And I love that quote from Ann V.

    I hope the rest of this move will be more fun and less stress. Moving is exhausting. I have moved SO many times. Enjoy you new place!!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s