Monday October 31, 2011 defines oxymoron as such: a figure of speech by which a locution produces an incongruous, seemingly self-contradictory effect, as in “cruel kindness” or “to make haste slowly.”

(^^another step toward independence: the use of knives!!)

i’m a little surprised it did not also include the definition of: ‘mothers everywhere who are, on a daily basis, driven to points of utter distraction, yet would lay down their very lives for the ones who call them mother.’
because, if you are anything like me, that can describe many a day in your existence.
sometimes, i think oxymoron just downright describes me.

(^^this? look like autumn to you? nope. me either!)

you know…i call myself a Christian, and yet, i can botch things up so royally that it hardly goes with the title i claim.
i claim to love my neighbors and want to do what i can to show Christ-like love to them, and still, i get annoyed when my privacy is invaded.
i say i love my husband and appreciate the sacrifice he makes for us every-single-day, and still, i feel short-fused when i don’t get my way when i want it.
i want to dig into God’s Word, i want to let it seep in and spill out of my very being, and yet, there are many a time when other ‘things’ beckon and lure me in with much greater luster and glamor.
it’s a long list really, this oxymoron that i am.

(^^ a rare, very rare thing. so glad my hubs caught it for me)

and, yet one of the most perplexing oxymorons that i think i am faced with is the thing of:
‘dying to live’.
my hopes, my dreams, my plans, my goals, my wishes.
all of them.
letting them go, letting them die.
letting them die right there at the foot of that old rugged cross.
letting them be buried.
and, in turn, living.
living His hopes, His dreams, His plans, His goals, His wishes for my life.
living with purpose only He can give my days…
living and loving with Love only He can instill in me…

die to live.
with Him.
perfect Love.

a happy week to you…



18 thoughts on “Monday October 31, 2011

  1. i was behind … but i’m caught up now : ) as usual, you’ve had some great ones lately. the snow is unreal!!! and i know that’s not the point of this post : ) so i’ll add your point was right on.

  2. i really like that last shot – reminds me of a poster i’ve had since i was a kid~of a little girl on a swing and at the top of the chains are the hands of God!oh, to swing in full out abandon and JOY, knowing HE’S the one who’s holding me!!

  3. Simple. True. Profound. Life-changing. (Do I say that every time you post?)   You inspire me.  Often.  Not because you are perfect.  But because you are reaching out to become like God.

  4. You are most certainly not alone in these struggles!! I can relate just a little.too.well!  Loved hearing your heart on this…its a beautiful thing!  Thanks for the inspiration.

  5. This was profound, Rachel…but you made it beautifully simple. The picture of you and b. is truly a treasure…as are you, yourself!I am so privileged to know you and to walk with you on this leg of the journey!

  6. this so resonates with me rachel. you have such a way of doing that for me. something DEEP… but with a smile at the same time.”anytime God calls us to die, His purpose is to reveal larger life.” i can’t say that this a fav quote, it’s too painful right now to be a fav. ya know?but i had just reviewed it again last week …and what you shared so beautifully, pointed in that same direction. thank you.

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